Dear Herb,

Screw the cyber thing, meet me for real. After i saw your video i wanted you so badly. I'll fly anywhere, to meet you, and give you the time of your life. as foreplay we can cyber first....mmmmmmmm...oh yeah!

--Miss Kitten


Dear Miss Kitten:

Like such greats as Gene Simmons and Wilt Chamberlain (may he rest in peace), I'm committed to having sex with each and every one of my fans. Unfortunately, that means that I have to abide by a strict "no face-to-face" rule. But don't worry, you won't be disappointed. The Herb Zipper assemblyline of sex is a well-oiled machine, if you get my drift...